Brittany Knows Best
by SageK
Summary: Brittany decides that Blaine needs to be happy again (he's sad when Kurt makes his relationship with Adam official) and, since Sam made her happy when she and Santana broke up, thinks he can do the same. Plus, she's not stupid and thinks that Blam would be so hot. Blam and Bram, possible Blaine/Sam/Brittany. Britt POV
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Brittany Knows Best Part 1

**Author:** blaineandsamevanderson

**Paring:** Pre-Blaine/Sam, Brittany/Sam, possible Blaine/Sam/Brittany

**Rating:** G

**Summary:** Prompt: Brittany decides that Blaine needs to be happy again (he's sad when Kurt makes his relationship with Adam official) and, since Sam made her happy when she and Santana broke up, thinks he can do the same. Plus, she's not stupid and thinks that Blam would be so hot.

**Notes**: Sorry for any typos. My transcription software doesn't always understand what I say and I don't always catch the mistakes. I have trouble typing things by hand since I suffered an injury last year to my right hand and it seizes up if I try to do too much.

* * *

Sometimes Brittany wondered why boys were so dumb about simple stuff. Even the smart ones. Her Unicorn was very smart, then he came home for Mr. Shue's sad not wedding, had kisses and sexytime with her Dolphin and then went back to New York and, a few days later, changed his Facebook status to _Kurt Hummel is in a relationship with Adam Crawford_.

As much as he tried to pretend, as many times as he insisted he and Kurt were just friends, Brittany knew better. She could see the hurt and longing in Blaine's eyes and didn't want him to start guzzling coffee and Cheetos or shave his head. His hair could be a little scary, but it wasn't that bad.

She wanted her Dolphin to be happy. At first, she thought she'd set him up on a date, the only other gay teenage boy she knew was Sebastian Smythe and he was not Dolphin compatible. He was one of those Electric Eels and Dolphins and Eels were natural enemies.

Then it hit her. When she had been so sad, it was Sam who made her smile again. He wanted Blaine to be happy too, she'd seen him watching her Dolphin with worried eyes. Between the two of them, they could totally make Blaine happy!

As a half Dolphnicorn, she knew these things.

Striding into Glee a little early, she was surprised to see Sam and Blaine already there, sitting together, Sam talking quickly about something that made Blaine nod, but he looked so tired and sad… Nope.

It was time to act.

With purpose, she walked over to them and, after giving Sam quick kiss on the cheek, she sat herself on Blaine's lap, putting her arms around his shoulders.

Confused, because boys were like that, Blaine said, "Hi Brittany… What are you doing?"

"You need more cuddles," as she told him firmly. "And, since I'm a genius, I know you boys are too silly to realize this. Sam, you should switch places with me. You give the best snuggles!"

Blaine just stared at her with wide eyes as Sam said, "I think I'm too big to sit on Blaine's lap."

"Oh," she replied, considering this before nodding. "He could sit on your lap! That's even better. All wrapped up in your arms and warm."

This time, Sam shrugged agreeably (because he was smarter than he knew and understood even if he didn't really) and Blaine burst out laughing, smiling a real smile before he said, "You two are crazy!"

"It's not crazy!" she replied with a grin and hopped up, turning and holding out her hands. "Up!"

"Brittany, I'm not going to sit on Sam's lap!" Blaine chuckled and Sam pouted and held out his own arms.

"What? I don't deserve a cuddle?" Sam said, making grabby hands at Blaine, who responded by swatting at him.

Being awesome, Sam caught Blaine's hands and, acting quickly, Brittany dove in, heaving the smaller boy up out of his seat and onto her boyfriend's lap. Both boys laughed, clearly surprised and she planted herself atop Blaine's thighs, raising her hands in triumph.

"I feel like monkey in the middle," Blaine snorted, pink cheeked and bright eyed and Brittany twisted, throwing one arm around Sam and the other around Blaine. Sam's arms wrapped around them both, warm and strong and, after a moment, Blaine hugged them back.

"Awesome," Sam said. "Hugs from my two favorite people!"

Blaine didn't say anything, but Brittany could feel him relaxing, letting himself lean into Sam's embrace and she could see the real smile on his face.

Clearly, her plan was off to an awesome start!


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Brittany Knows Best Part 2

**Author:** blaineandsamevanderson

Paring: Pre-Blaine/Sam, Brittany/Sam, possible Blaine/Sam/Brittany

Rating: PG

Summary: Prompt: Brittany decides that Blaine needs to be happy again (he's sad when Kurt makes his relationship with Adam official) and, since Sam made her happy when she and Santana broke up, thinks he can do the same. Plus, she's not stupid and thinks that Blam would be so hot.

**Notes**: Sorry for any typos. My transcription software doesn't always understand what I say and I don't always catch the mistakes. I have trouble typing things by hand since I suffered an injury last year to my right hand and it seizes up if I try to do too much.

* * *

A few days later, she felt Blaine had adjusted to her sudden hug attacks. It was clear he preferred Sam's hugs, but since he was a dolphin, that was totally understandable. Sam was super hot and he totally agreed with her plan to give Blaine the hugs he needed.

Time for step two!

"Sleepover tonight!" she exclaimed, bouncing on her toes by Blaine and Sam, who had been chatting by the lockers. "Us, a Supernatural marathon and all the snuggles we can snuggle!"

"Cool," Sam said and Brittany beamed at him. He was a good boyfriend.

Turning to Blaine, she said, "Can you come?"

He blinked, looking startled. "Me? Isn't this something you want to be alone for?"

She shook her head. "No, silly. I didn't say we were going to have sex. Just cuddles…though you could totally have sex with us sometime if you wanted. It's on my bucket list."

"Yeah, Dude, come cuddle. It'll be fun," Sam said and Brittany grinned, noticing that Sam didn't totally veto the idea of a threesome like most boys would…Well, a threesome that included two boys. They all wanted to have two girls involved and that was great, but she had her list.

Blaine stared at them for a moment and Brittany decided to go all in to seal the deal. "You can pick the first episode…and we always have yummy snacks and Sam doesn't eat enough of them, so you could help!"

For some reason, Blaine made a funny face at her statement, but a few weeks ago she had noticed that whenever she mentioned Sam's food weirdness (seriously, what boy didn't want to eat all the time?), Blaine would appear with a piece of fruit or juice box, which sounded accept with a little smile.

So yeah, she wasn't surprised when he agreed to sleepover after all.

Reentering around (she'd left the boys there to change into their pajamas and pile up the pillows on the bed for them lean against) with an assortment of snacks, Brittany grinned at Blaine. "I like your pajamas!"

His blue cotton pajama set was layered over a bright white T-shirt and made him look like he stepped out of one of those old movies her Nana liked to watch on TMC.

"Thanks. I like yours," he replied, putting a DVD into the player. "Is that Lord Tubbington on your shirt?"

"Yep!" she agreed happily. "There's a place at the mall that can put his picture on anything!"

After Sam moved Lord and Lady Tubbington over to their cat bed, Brittany pointed to her own bed. "Sam, scoot to the middle."

Like a good boyfriend, he obeyed without complaint and took the large bowl of popcorn she handed him. "Air popped?" he asked with a smile, happy that she remembered how he liked his popcorn.

She preferred Smart Food, because she was a genius.

"Of course," she said setting is bottled water on headboard and leaning against his right side.

On the other side of the bed, Blaine sat at the edge, but Blaine soon reeled him in, saying, "Dude, you can't cuddle if you're all the way over there."

It took a moment for Blaine to relax, but eventually he did, resting his head on Sam's shoulder.

Later, they could switch positions. She liked it when Sam slept with his head on her chest, so obviously it would be better with two boys. Then Blaine could be in the middle.

As the first episodes progressed, Brittany occasionally fed Sam bites of popcorn, then grabbed a dark chocolate/Chile bar, snapped a tiny bit off and offered to it Sam. It was his favorite candy, so he accepted and, smiling, she handed Blaine the candy.

After they laughed over how much one of the actors in Wendigo looked like Finn, Blaine held another tiny bite of chocolate to Sam's lips, cheeks pink and smiling happy as Sam nipped it from his fingers.

Good.

Happy Blaine was a good thing.

When the Bloody Mary episode came on, she froze the DVD. "Wait! There's a mirror… Will the DVD saying you know what maker come?"

Sam frowned, considering her words while Blaine just looked puzzled. "Who… Bloody Mary?"

"Shhhh!" Brittany and Sam chorused and she added, "Don't say her name!"

"Would you like me to cover the mirror with a towel?" Blaine asked and Brittany sighed in relief.

That was the sort of solution Santana would have come up with.

"Yes," she agreed and, while he was covering the mirror, she nudged Sam over so she could be in the middle.

Blaine seemed to find this funny, but he settled his raspberry scented head against her without a fuss, though he did seem a little confused as to where he should actually rest his cheek.

"My boobs don't bite," she laughed and Sam stretched an arm over her to give Blaine a teasing poke.

"Yeah, they're like perfect little pillows," he told Blaine, who laughed and did finally put his cheek against her.

"Huh," he muttered after a while. "Comfy…and you smell like cotton candy."

She hummed, patting his shoulder. "It's my body lotion. It's edible and makes me taste like candy."

"It really does," Sam agreed and Britney tugged at the neck of her T-shirt to reveal her collarbones.

"Taste?" she offered and Blaine blinked at her.

"What? No, Brittany, I'm not going to lick you!"

Sam chuckled. "You don't have to do it, dude, but if you want to, it's cool."

Then Sam tilted his head and licked one collarbone before sealing his lips against her and sucking gently.

Brittany could tell Blaine was more interested in watching Sam's lips then what she might taste like, but he made a soft noise and leaned in, tasting her skin with tiny little licks.

Giggling, she said, "It's like you're a kitten!"

With a laugh of his own, Blaine resettled his head on her chest. "This is a very strange night."

"Having fun?" Sam asked happily and Brittany was glad to hear Blaine continued to chuckle.

"I am."

Smiling, Britney said, "Great. Oh, I have lots of flavors of lotion. Later we can rub some on both of you so we can all have neck kisses. I know Sam likes the raspberry lotion and you already smell like raspberry, so that will work out well…what would you like to lick off of Sam?"

She didn't know why Blaine sounded like he was choking. He wasn't eating anything.

"Uuhhh," he mumbled after a moment. "I don't think that's such a good idea, Britt…."

"Why?" she asked, confused. "You kissed on my neck and you want to kiss Sam more...Oh! It's okay! I don't mind... In fact, you guys feel free to have boy kisses anytime you want."

"Britt?" Sam asked, sounding as confused as Blaine looked and she shook her head.

Boys.

"I love you, Sam, your great boyfriend… But I'm still in love with Santana too… And I love you, Blaine, you're a super friend… We've all got enough love in us, if we try to bottle it up, we'll be sad and eventually something will just explode! Why can't we just love everyone!"

"Because not everyone wants to…uh, kiss on everyone," Blaine murmured and Britney shrugged.

"Sam and I do."

"No," Sam disagreed Brittany frowned. "You're attracted to everyone, Britt, I'm attracted to certain girls and guys, not everyone."

Blaine's eyes looked like those of the baby cartoon animal. "Certain guys? Since when?"

Sam shrugged. "Uh, always, I guess, but it didn't matter because I have a girlfriend…."

"Who is just letting you know, I'm fine with you to having hot, sexy time together if you want to."

They blinked at her for a moment before Sam said, "You're the best girlfriend ever, Britt."

"I know," she agreed, then tugged Blaine close. "Let's watch Bloody Mary!"

For a few minutes, they watched Supernatural in silence, then Blaine asked, "Do you have any chocolate lotion?"

Step two of her plan was clearly a success!


End file.
